Krysta (kleedel01) wrote,

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OK, so this is really strange but I made a few modifications to my computer and I can now view and update my journal from home. The strangest part is that I know nothing about computers except for the microscopic amount of info I retained from P. Kinni (Patrick Kinnicut) lol...anyways, life is great! Everyone around me is getting married or talks about marriage. That scares me. Been there almost did that and I'n not convinced that I'd like to go down that road again! It was joyful and painful, exciting and depressing, but most of all I ended up crying in the end and it wasn't one of those happy cries a woman has at the alter. I dunno, I guess after my 2 past proposals I'm just thankful to be enjoying being a couple without the pressure of marriage. I'm not saying that I don't someday want to marry Mark b/c I love him more than anything else in my life right now and he's one of the best things that has ever happened to me but I'm enjoying him and I being gf and bf and I'm enjoying the excitement and everything that goes along with dating. I dunno, I just want the next time I'm proposed to to be the last time. I want to get this right (i think I may have it right) but only time will tell. Anyways, that was really random. I've really been thinking about how much I wish I could get out of living in the house. Its going to cost my parents a ton, maybe so much that my sister Rachel won't be able to ever go away to college. Also, I'm afraid that if I end up graduating in December 06 instead of May 06 that I won't be able to get a job until August 07 and that's a long ass time to go careerless especially when I need to pay back my student loans. Because all the reasons I was staying here have fallen through it doesn't make sense for me to stay an extra semester even tho I luv Megan and want to live with her. Oh well, it's too late now. Everyone has already signed leases so no one is going to want to go back on that and live in the house now. Oh well! On another note, my "to do" list got shorter today. I crossed two things off. Including exams and SGA stuff I have roughly 18 things left to do before Dec. 15th (I hope)
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